It is terribly cliche how every investigation leads to more questions, but it seems to be so. Staying occupied & a direction is what matters I suppose. I would not say I have direction beyond self intensification. Writing my axioms, disintegrating my personality. We may benefit in comparing notes again soon – but when. i have no idea.
I have the same list of social names since we last met. I saw my father, but not even my mother. I developed no new intimate relationship dynamics, & I even found some prospects: with novelty. I didn’t pursue them, 4 – one highly impressive. But I have nothing to offer their ‘world side’. ‘Eccentric’ & ‘philosopher’ only goes so far, I just can not keep the fire of motivation burning for anyone else at this time. Not for a genesis.
I’m seeing ma next wknd. But mostly I want to be alone. I start again every morning blank; it is a core technique of mine. Like exodus, A/A~I=A (A/0). Then access each file only as required. The life of an automata. My tracking of time is bizarrely “worse”. I see people who I saw yesterday & it feels like it could have been a year. I could ‘work’ on it – but why is the other way better? I keep appointments, after a fashion. I am exploring myself, & only need time just enough to keep interference away- I have that.
It is (unfortunately) predictably appalling what academic philosophy does to thinking, with its over categorization & recitation. Difficult to have a str8 conversation most of the time without reference to a school of thought, often a dead one, for comparrison.
But things are good enough. It is still the first world.
I see your meals, your social exchange (like [REDACTED] LA’s birthday, gf ect). Your work/time trade appears stable. These are the core input houses.
I intend to integrate anime as a permanent part of my distraction persona. I’m in public too often now to not give something for people to hang on to, & to diversify from academic philosophy; which is an identity threat to too many of these people. The Jaii interface was never designed for this length of uninterupted running time, and the whole portfolio requires an upgrade.
May amp up politics just a bit more too. Pick a position. Travel is still a hassle. Sobriety still has presented blocks.
It is pretty good though; we still have will to think about the sun and tilt of the earth, or tp become a plant.
I think some philosophers just stop looking for purpose, just never ask anymore.
The blank mind and rere (reacting/responding to what crosses my path) describes my path currently. It always seemed like a cop out though. But nothing is.
We have it so good here. No matter what the day brings, when I lay in that comfortable bed at night (or day as the case may be) & light my incense; I never fail to remember that.
Note comparrison soon.